Holiday Blues

Thank god we're home!! It's certainly been quite a week.

Flight to Portugal was late, and as we hadn't travelled with Linda and David, they had to collect us from the airport. You'd think we did it on purpose. Apparently we interrupted their afternoon siesta - could have a nap any bloody time.

First night wasn't too bad, went out for a lovely meal to Fernando's - Lionel ordered scampi, should have known it wasn't normal breaded scampi when they brought out these strange implements (looked like something you would dissect a crab with). Anyway when Lionel tried to open them, one went flying and hit this rather large lady at the next table. It wouldn't have been so bad but it was covered in a oily dressing and it slowly slid down her bare back and onto her dress (she was wearing a halter neck - very brave thing to wear when your that big). Lionel looked like a guppy - with purple face and mouth just opening and closing with nothing coming out. As you can imagine the lady was not amused but we did buy her a bottle of wine to apologise. Thankfully we walked back to the villa, so no car singing.

Next couple of days went very slowly, with the same routine full english breakfast, lots of sunbathing and drinks around the pool about 3ish. I fear my hips are now bulging. It's always hard being someone's guest and having your day mapped out for you. God, I sound so ungrateful! It was the evenings that were the hardest though - we had to play cards or scrabble (hate, hate, hate scrabble - even hid Lionel's so he couldn't bring it with us) Things got a bit tense though. Linda hates to lose and it was great when either Lionel or I scored high words at the beginning of the game (what a look she gave us) but as the game went on you've got less letters to play with and I could tell she's played this seriously before. Everytime they got a high score she would jump up and shout "Go Simpson's" or high five David - got quite unpleasant at times. Not sure I like this side of them. Needless to say they beat us at most of the games. Not bitter about it.

Lionel and David went golfing on the fourth day to a place called Oitavos Dunes near Lisbon. Well it's been quite some time since Lionel has played a round and he was in a dreadful state the next day. You'd think he'd been on some kind of marathon, he could hardly move. Hurray he beat David though (makes a change).

But it was really the last night that confirmed my feelings towards David and Linda. We'd all gone out for a meal (we'd paid for it to say thank you for having us - although thinking about it, we had actually contributed quite a bit by paying for most of the food and drink shopping throughout the week) anyway, they chose the most expensive meals on the menu and we must have gone through at least 3 bottles of some really expensive stuff when Linda started going on about their Jackie again (think she was a bit squiffy) I am sick of hearing how wonderful she's doing at the law firm, but managed to stay quiet. Lionel kept giving me that look he does when he's worried I'm going to say something embarrassing, but think Linda managed to do that quite well herself. She started getting louder and louder (think she was trying to impress the people at the next table) and waving her hands about - problem was, she was still holding a full glass of red wine and just as she was gesticulating about being "top of your game", the contents of her glass went flying across the floor. This wouldn't have been so bad, but the waiter just happened to be walking past carrying the puddings to the next table, when he slipped on the wine - puds went everywhere and total silence descended across the restaurant. Lionel, bless him, wiped the souffle off his shoulder (said it tasted quite nice) and helped the poor chap up off the floor, afraid the desserts could not be saved. Shame they did look rather nice. Could not believe Linda, she didn't offer to help clear up the mess she'd caused - said rather loudly "David, that's what they get paid to do" and looked at the waiter as if it was all his fault. What a cow! We paid the bill and Linda and David staggered back to the villa while we finished our coffee.

Hadn't heard from Martin at all, I did try him on his mobile a few times but just kept ringing, left a few messages but he must be really busy at the moment with work.

Headed back to airport (by taxi) Linda was still in bed with probably a rather nasty hangover, so said goodbye to David, must say he looked a bit sheepish, probably best not mention last night.

Didn't like to say anything at the time, but found some strange little blue tablets in their bathroom cabinet. Lionel said I shouldn't be so nosey, but feel it may have explained their afternoon siesta sessions!